Never Trust A Doctor Whose Office Plants Have Died

Never Trust A Doctor Whose Office Plants have Died..

By

Vivek Hande

 It has been three and a half decades treating patients and more than two decades as a Gastroenterologist. I have had the privilege of taking care of and looking after patients across the country. I was able to do good to a few; maybe cure some; maybe put some on the path to recovery and along the way, lost some patients too who succumbed to their illness. I can cross my heart and say that I gave my best to every patient and did all that I could for him or her. I can say with confidence that each patient taught me something and gave back in return, in abundance.

 Some patients were rude and arrogant and insolent and utterly ungrateful. They seemed to take everything for granted. I would have to confess they were a very small minority; but they did teach me how not to behave and how not to conduct oneself. There is no doubt that this population does exist and one has to learn to take it in one’s stride. It is an important lesson to bear in mind .. 

 But I have received immeasurably from my patients, many who are a part of my extended family today. I received lessons in indomitable spirit and resilience from MSK who succumbed to advanced hepatocellular carcinoma after a protracted illness. Till the very last day, he was dressed in his tweed coat and retained his razor-sharp wit and never did I see him express rancour or bitterness. He was often in severe pain, but he dealt with his disease with grace and equanimity. He would try make small banter and attempt humour till the very end.

 Then there was SS who was paralyzed waist downwards following an accident. He arranged his daughter’s wedding on Zoom Calls from the ward; made all arrangements on phone and went and attended the wedding dressed in a Sherwani, riding in on a wheelchair. Not once did he lose faith or confidence or his composure. He kept telling me if this is what was destined, who was he to fight destiny- he did what he had to with dignity. These were real life heroes, if there ever were. There have been more such unforgettable characters and they left a deep impression on me and gave me such an incredible life lesson. 

Nothing Can be more dangerous!!!

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One thing that one learns over the years is that the ‘patient is always right.’ One has learnt several times that ignoring this dictum is at your own peril. There is no place for arrogance or the belief that you know everything and you are infallible. The patient more often than not does not follow the textbook and the earlier one realizes this, the better it is! 

 Music would always play in my OPD or Endoscopy suites. Patients often exchanged ‘musical notes’ with me, once they were a tad better. They would suggest certain other artistes or a particular genre and I daresay, they have contributed immensely to my enjoyment of a diverse range of music. Some even confessed that they came and sat in the OPD waiting area only to listen to music and not because they had an ailment! Be that as it may, my appreciation of different artists and genres increased thanks to their suggestions.

 Some of my them, who have been my patients for chronic ailments for more than two decades or so have kind of adopted me and made me an honorary member of their family. There are lots of kids and some grandkids who go by the name “Vivek”, apparently a tribute to me and that is rather overwhelming, to say the least. Many ask for career advice for their children and many even want my ‘approval’ when they are fixing the marriage of their son / daughter – I try telling them, I am hardly an authority on careers or relationships, but that is the way it is. It is a measure of the importance doctors have in the lives of patients- it is special and yet challenging in its own way. It is also immensely humbling. Then there are advice/ suggestions/ recommendations on various issues given to you by patients once they have been around you for long and one is part of their extended family. 

There was a lady, she succumbed to Covid 19 two years ago. She was based in Tirupati. She was my patient for Inflammatory Bowel Disease and would come for a follow up wherever I was posted. Every six months she would come with two packets – Tirupati Ladoos from the temple and a packet of hair dye. She would insist I was too young to have so much silver on my head. I would accept the Ladoos with gratitude and tell her to let the silver be... she never did give up! Then there were some patients, old enough to be my mother, who would ask me lose weight or gain weight; have less coffee, play more soothing music, take a break and go for a holiday or smile more often and so on …

 The Doctor -Patient relationship is truly unique and quite unlike any other. It is precious; it is sacred and very special. The Doctor -Patient relationship is based on trust, knowledge, respect and communication. Doctors are healers; they shouldn’t act like judges or cops. A healer is someone whose hand the patient wants to hold. Somebody once told me long back; an average doctor saves a body; a good doctor saves a being. The art of healthcare is the most sublime act to practice compassion with the prescription of empathy and tenderness. There is no one fit for all. The prescription has to be individualized to the patient.

 Truly, as somebody has so succinctly remarked, “As a doctor, you don’t practice medicine, rather you become the medicine yourself.’ Cicero(106BC-43BC), “In nothing do men nearly approach the gods than in giving health to men.” I always do like to remind myself and my junior colleagues, something which is attributed to Seneca, “People pay for the doctor for his trouble; for his kindness they still remain in debt’.. it is truly a privilege to be given the opportunity to care and cure; heal and give hope…

It is a privilege to care & cure